Tuesday, November 15, 2011

The "No" stage

Yes, Anya has arrived at the "no" stage.It appears to suddenly dawn on her that routines are meant to be disrupted, rules broken and boundaries tested.

"Bath after drinking juice?" - No.
"Bring your cup to auntie to wash." - No.
"Say grace." - No.
"Keep your megabloks." - No.
"Time's up for using iPad." - NO!

Mind you, I noticed that the recent "Nos" have been perfected with a growling tone to it,as she looks straight into my eyes with a taunting glint shining from hers. Bah..! Where did she learn all these?

Coupled with this particular favorite word of the moment, she has further upped her boundaries-testing skills by requesting for all the things that she likes repeatedly. For example, she always knew that vitamin gummy is given only before bedtime at night and would only ask for it after she is changed into her pajamas. These days, she would start asking for it even before she has changed out of her pajamas to start the day.

It is as if our lovely angelic toddler has skipped her childhood and accelerated straight to the rebellious teenage stage overnight.

In response, The Husband and I have gone through rounds of strategising and brainstorming. Now, we are fully geared for battle with armour and what-nots. Keywords and key phrases of our battle plan are such as 'be firm', 'consistency', 'be firm', 'keep temper in check', 'be firm', 'try not to tear out what little hair that we already have', 'be firm', 'next better player please'.

Just an hour ago, I was out in the battlefield getting her to bring her cup to The Helper after she finished her juice and then go for her bath. Unfortunately, The Husband is away at work, so the backup plan of 'next better player please' was not an option for me. So, I had to suck it in, BE FIRM and repeatedly ask her to do what is expected, rationalising to her why good behaviour is needed along the way.

At some point, when I sensed that she was not going to budge from her couch, I told her that I would have to yank her out of her seat. Sure, I did. Together with the cup. By then, The Helper had disappeared into the kitchen, very harassed by all the crying. Had not being the fact that she (The Helper) had a role to play here of collecting the cup, I am pretty certain she would gladly disappear into the safety haven in the form of a dark and stuffy storeroom and shut the door behind her.

This time round, I even exerted self-control by holding back as she sobbed piteously and ran towards me, begging for hugs. Instead, I held her hand, led her back to the cup, and tell her "No. You got to bring the cup to auntie and go 'pompom'".  After a couple of times of her begging me to hug her and me leading her back to the cup again, she finally relented and did what was told. Then, I reiterated to her the importance of good behavior and obeying parents, then finally hugged her while praising her for the good job.

Phew..! Yes, Ms. Tan (my dear secondary form teacher), you were right about having to be cruel in order to be kind. This is going to be my new parenting motto.

On a lighter note, here's some random terrible iPhone quality pictures, some of which showing what Anya-zilla does best - destroying our building block works. In our defence, we have purchase another set of megabloks and built an enclosure around her to ground her.

'yum seng-ing' at a wedding banquet

Only Eeyore, Muff & Daddy are allowed access into Anyazilla's enclosure.

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