Can I go to the bathroom, please?

Right from the start, The Husband and I believed in saying our goodbyes and pre-empting Anya before we go off to anywhere without her.

We think that by doing so can aid in raising a secured child. Disappearing acts may result in suspicion leaving the child wondering when we will appear again when we are away. There may well be repercussions where she will be even more 'sticky' when we appear once again. On the other, long and gushy goodbyes may over-dramatize the departure causing the child to be over-sentimental. So, we thought this is a good balance where she is trained to take departures well, knowing that secured love goes beyond constant physical attachment. 

When she was two months old, I started leaving her at The In-laws once or twice a week. Even then, where she was still a sleepy dazed teeny baby, I have began my goodbye routines. No disappearing acts. Nor drama-rama farewells. Just a simple kiss and hug, then I tell her roughly what time Daddy and Mommy will be back for her. Even up till today, we still maintain the same routine, except that it is more elaborate now that we need her to reciprocate and acknowledge our departure. 

Sure, there were a few rare occasions where it did not go so well. Still, nothing that a few more hugs and words of reassurances can't solve. After some tears and fussing, she eventually relented, giving us her flying kisses and waving her goodbyes.

These days, informing her of our departures has extended to even short toilet breaks and bath-times. Sometimes, she does not take it well, especially when there is only The Helper and I around - which means that she will be left alone with The Helper when Mommy's in the bathroom. Again, she usually gives her nod of approval after one or two more tries.

We think we will carry on this parental belief onto No. 2 - even if it makes us feel like primary school children asking for permission to go to the toilet all over again.

Updating my desktop's background

For months, my desktop background was a picture of Anya @ 7 months old taken together with The Furkid. Then, Anya's hair still resembled a wild mane of a rambutan.

I've been wanting an updated shot of the both of them. Every time I switch on my laptop and see that picture, I am reminded of it. A quick scan through of our digital album tells me that I do not have a suitable picture. I need one that has both of them looking at the camera and none of them should be blurry.

Finally, I've gotten down to do it. I put the both of them back onto the same swivel chair. With a snack (for The Furkid) in one hand, and the camera pointing at them in the other, I got the picture I wanted at first shot.

I am still amazed at how much my little girl has transformed over the last nine months. Right under my nose! She ain't a baby anymore!

I am a whale

Last night was date night for The Husband and I.

I was decked in a pair of skinny jeggings that I bought on my last Bangkok trip (one size bigger than usual especially for preggy me!) and a grey nursing cum maternity camis from Old Navy. As I was about to leave the house, The Helper came up to me and said, "Mdm, skinny legs!".

Half-flattered and half-concerned if that implies that Mini Bun is not growing enough, I asked, "Tummy?".

"Eh?", my helper hesitated for a while. Then she replied, "Your tummy? Very biggg!". And to further emphasize her point, her eyes widened into two large saucers.

The conversation really should have ended there. It would have left me contented to know that my tummy is big enough to support the pregnancy and yet at the same time, to have my legs still relatively skinny.

Well, it didn't. The Helper added on, "Mdm, you been eating alot!".

Coming from someone who has been pregnant twice, it made me wonder if I have been overeating for this pregnancy. Feeling like a whale now.

At 26 weeks, I have gained 7kgs - same amt of weight gained during my entire first pregnancy

Posing for the camera

On a totally irrelevant note first: It is such a bliss to be able to stroll along wide empty isles in a mall on a Saturday evening. I am usually apprehensive to snap away on my camera in public. Here, I did not have to worry about being self-conscious at all. I was very glad that I took these pictures as I thought they captured some happy faces there.

My charming tot has learned to pose in front of the camera. Whenever she sees Mommy whip out the camera and aiming it at her, she would adjust herself by backtracking till about 1.5meters away, stand still and smile slightly. After I'm done by announcing 'Okay!', she will run towards me eagerly, reaching for the camera to review her pictures.

Such is the phenomena that we get to see in a technology-savvy world! :)

Good news

We saw the urologist yesterday for the test results. While it is confirmed that I have proteinuria, the good news is we have ruled out the major kidney problems and diseases. 

Based on the findings, the urologist concluded that my condition falls under the other category of kidney-related field and referred me to a renal specialist instead. Straight away, we drove down to Gleneagles from Mt. E to see the renal specialist. More good news to follow from the meeting with the renal specialist. While the level of protein in my urine is higher than normal; it is not excessively high. He concluded that my case is either a type of kidney disease where there is inflammation in a small specific part of my kidney or it could even be pregnancy-related, meaning there is a possibility the abnormal protein 'leakage' may go away post-pregnancy.  In any case, I cannot undergo medication now as available drugs are not good for the baby. So meanwhile, he will be running more tests on me and co-monitoring my pregnancy together with my gynae.

Thank you, Jesus, for His covering over me. A couple of close friends who knew about my predicament had been praying for me. The message they all gotten from the HS was congruous - there was peace. On Sunday's service, He further assured me that 'it is done'. I knew then that I had no reason to fear. I am in good hands. Praise the Lord!

She's eating more these days

After the post where I mentioned that she refused to eat, I have decided to totally ditch making separate porridge for her. It was really pointless, and a waste too, to see those porridge cleared away into the trash bag at the end of every day.

Instead, she eats what we eat these days. Of course, it means we have to alter our cooking style and eating preference. Lunches on weekdays are usually simple home-cooked one-dish meals. I no longer use salt in my stock for macaronis and kuey teows (no more salt in most of my cooking in fact!). Instead, I've found a wonderful alternative in the form of chicken bones which makes the broth really flavorful!

Flavorful and hearty macaroni!

So it is usually kuey teow soup, macaroni soup or fish porridge for lunches. Sometimes, we have fried rice or plain porridge with simple dishes. For back-ups, I will make dessert soups such as red bean soups and sweet potato soup. Here, sugar is used sparingly. For dinners, it is usually steamed organic brown rice with 2-3 dishes and a soup. It is at dinner where I could sneak in a favorite spicy dish of curry or sambal occasionally.

The verdict? Well, it seems to work well with her. She still steers clear of meats and leafy parts of vegetables. Give her eggs (any form!) and she is a happy bunny. Also, while it is only once in a blue moon that she cleans out her plate, but hey, I am not pushing it! I am actually quite contented to see her finishing more than half of what was dished out to her - which is happening on most meals. Those dessert soups and fruits can help to fill out the rest of her stomach.

She is also making progress in her milk intake. From the supposedly 600ml a day, it had dropped to a miserable 300ml at one point. Recently, with a lot of positive reinforcements from The Husband and I, it has gradually improved to 450ml a day.

Already, the results are visible to me. I can see her cheeks filling out, just a tiny wee bit.

It is enough to put my mind at ease for now. :)

Running the tests

We were at the urologist's clinic yesterday. 

She fell asleep on our bus trip there. Thankfully, The Husband was already waiting for us at the alighting bus stop.

Walking Catty with Daddy while Mommy was with the nurses

The doctor is a soft-spoken man who is very careful with his words. After having a preliminary discussion with us, he sent me to the bathroom to produce some pee while he spoke on the phone with a renal specialist.

Initially, he was considering doing the investigation works only after I give birth. However, his joint conclusion with the renal specialist was that they could run some tests (those that will not harm the baby) first, and where they could detect the problem, would start treatment. He was very patient and (as I mentioned earlier) careful in answering our queries. From what I presented to him, he ruled out diabetes (which I have a family history of). Likelihood could be some form of kidney disease. But then again, it could also be nothing except for a scare. Until the test results come out, he emphasized that there really isn't any need for sleepless nights and stress. He also added on that with the test results (blood, ultrasound scan and a detail 24-hour urine test), he might still have to run further tests. 

Last night, I have been worse hit emotionally so far. On the contrary to the urologist's assurance, the visit has inflicted fear, stress and sleeplessness. I am desperate to hear God's voice, for a hint of His assurance. I am prompted by faith to bare my soul here so that I may glorify His name. In this time of uncertainty, He is the only one who can calm me. 

I claim 2 Corinthians 12:7-10, "Therefore, in order to keep me from becoming conceited, I was given a thorn in my flesh, a messenger of Satan, to torment me. ⁸ Three times I pleaded with the Lord to take it away from me. ⁹ But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me. ¹⁰ That is why, for Christ’s sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong."

Another online pre-loved bargain

 This was one of Popo's birthday gifts to Anya. These days, she is quite good at it, being able to cut most of the items without our help. Seeing how popular this set of toys has been with her, I thought that it will be a wonderful addition have a toy kitchen set for her.

I have seen how good other creative blogger mummies are with their nimble fingers. With some imagination and pooling of household resources, they could build a make-believe sink &/or oven for their little ones. Well, I think I am not so good at that.

On the other hand, it seems like an extravagance to spend more than a hundred bucks on a toy set just because I think she may like them. Therefore, off to Singapore Motherhood forum's marketplace I went. In the past two weeks, I went into their marketplace's 'To Sell' section whenever I open up my laptop and search for keywords including 'cook', 'kitchen', 'sink' and 'oven'. For days, nothing relevant came up. But with a stroke of luck and some patience, my efforts finally paid off on National Day.

A mommy wanted to sell a good condition toy kitchen. She disclaimed that it was not for fussies but then again, I am not fussy. Neither are toddlers. After some negotiation, we settled for a consideration one-third off its original price-tag.

A few afternoons ago, while Anya was away at her grandparents', I set it up (it was dismantled when we collected it for ease of transportation) after The Helper rinsed it in Dettox. I deliberately hid it in our bedroom as Anya was due for her milk feed and second nap when she arrived home.

Well, it did not go as planned. After I went over to The In-laws and back, pregnancy amnesia struck once again. Without thinking, I instructed Anya to wait outside our master bedroom's bathroom for have her hands washed while I put away her Eeyore first.

The kitchen set easily caught her eyes. Before I could stop her, she had gleefully ran to set and started tinkering with it. So there! For the next 45 minutes or so, The Helper and I could not persuade her to wash her hands, drink her milk nor take her nap. Her attention was totally rapt! Less off the slight exasperation that she was ignoring us, we were actually quite amused that she seemed to know exactly what to do around a kitchen! Looks like someone has been observing us while we are pottering around the stove and sink!

We have moved the toy set to her bedroom since. These days, cooking has somewhat been incorporated into her before-bedtime routine. So yeah, going by how much she likes the cooking set, I'd say this online purchase is more than a bargain! Its a steal! :)

Swinging like a pendulum

My state of mind, that is. It has been swinging from unrest to calmness. I am sure those pregnancy hormones have a part to play in amplifying the effects, even though there are some valid factors that trigger those unsettled feelings in the first place.

At a mighty age of 16 months, Anya seems to have already embark nicely onto the Terrible Twos. She is especially clingy, exhibiting separation anxiety and want The Husband or myself to carry her throughout the whole day. She refuses to eat at most of the meals, even refuses to sit on the highchair. Sometimes, she bites me when I try to hold her together or tell her 'no'. Other times, she will hurt herself by biting her arm, pulling her hair or banging her head against the floor as a form of protest.

It can get stressful.

Yesterday, we went for an assessment in KKH to check for allergic rhinitis (mild to moderate case). My heart sank to know that she lost weight for the first time since after she was born.

After the KKH visit was my regular pre-natal appointment. My usually cool and nonchalant gynae pointed out that I have proteins in my urine persistently since the beginning of this pregnancy despite already undergone a course of antibiotics. He has referred me to a urologist and I am going in to see him next week.

To find rest for my soul, I seek God. Seeing a specialist, to run some tests on me means there will be results. That, in turn, stirs fear. I pray to our Jehovah Rapha, pinning my fears onto the cross. He is our Healer, and I gotta trust in Him. So whenever I feel fear or unrest stirring inside me, I start praying again.

With regards to Anya, we pray too. To seek His wisdom and guidance in parenting her, in pinpointing the problem (if there is any). The Husband and I talk through it last night, to re-frame our expectations and come to a consensus as to how to manage when she acts up. Naturally, I feel better knowing we have a thought-through plan of action.

It is great to know that I am not in this alone. The Husband and I work as a team and our Heavenly Father watches over us and guides us. While it is inevitable that like I will still swing to and fro, every now and then, I just wanna be thankful.

I caved in...

.... and purchased a pair of crocs sandals for Anya. 

Before I had kids (and even during those times when Anya had arrived but have yet to master the skill of walking and thus do not require footwear), I always sneered at these sandals, christening them as Ronald McDonald's shoes. I will confide in The Husband how I wonder why almost every children we come across seemed to own at least a pair of 'those aesthetically-offensive things' - so common that it almost looked as if it was Singapore's uniform footwear for kids under the age of twelve. I mean, I know Crocs' footwear are really durable, comfy, light and safe (rubbery anti-slip soles!)- I myself own a pair of Crocs mary-janes from the time I was pregs with Anya and I'm still wearing them today. But they are mary-janes, not the famous Crocs' big-head sandals design. I believed at some point, I even swore to The Husband that I would never subject our children to the humiliation of wearing those 'clown shoes'.

Anya's first pair of casual footwear was a pair of pre-walking sandals from FOX. It came in a pretty matted gold colour and complements her chubby feet nicely. After 3-4 months of wear and tear, they are no longer pretty. The sides are badly scratched, the gold colour has given way to shades of dirt grey and black. And the velcro straps no longer secure well. Not to mention also that she is likely to outgrow them in matter of weeks.

So, about three weeks ago, we embarked on a search for her next pair of sandals. As it turns out, looking for a pair of suitable sandals for a toddler is an uphill task. 

Generally, I minimize pink and cartoon characters when it comes to dressing up Anya. Instead, I prefer to expose her to the whole array of colours as well as patterns such as polkadots and stripes.  It seems that sandals in the market (at least in the limited places that we shopped at) were predominantly pink in colour or comes with Dora / Kitty / Barbie stamped on them. So those were out. What were left amongst the minority were eliminated due to reasons such as comfort (soles too hard or heavy, blisters magnets etc), ease of wearing (buckled straps and hyperactive toddlers simply do not go well), sizing (either too big or too small) and pricing ($100 for a pair of sandals that she's gonna wear for a mere 3-4 months?!?!).

There was also the circumstantial conditions whenever we go shopping to consider. In order to ensure suitability, I have to bring Anya along to try on the shoes. I, myself, am now a waddling big-bellied pregnant woman who will straining in backache should I stand for more than 30 seconds. It is next to impossible to send The Husband to go shopping for footwear for our daughter. I dread to even muster up my imagination as to what he will come back with. When we do go shopping, it is usually for teeny pockets of time in between settling a meal and doing grocery-shopping or attending church. As you can see, we really do not have that much time for shopping to begin with. 

Reflecting on my personal experience, it gradually dawned on me why Crocs sandals is our unofficial national footwear for age 12 and below. The beauty of Crocs sandal are becoming glaringly clear to me. The ease of wearing and taking off, the lightness of the material, the safety of their anti-slip soles, the comfort and durability. They are godsend goodness for parents of young children! And so, along with my harsh criticisms of these sandals, I ate the humble pie and concede they are indeed suitable casual footwear for kiddos.

One thing I still cannot agree on, though, is the price-tag that comes with the sandals. I really hate to spend $60 for a pair of .. erm.. ugly but adorable sandals that my child will outgrow in a couple of months. Especially since her last pair of sandals was picked up at a clearance sale for a mere $4. So, I went online in search for a pair of size 6/7 pre-loved Crocs sandals and was happy to lock in a deal at $15.

Conclusion? Anya is very pleased with her 'new' sandals while I am glad that the sandals shopping days are over. At least for now.

Something to lift our spirits when sunshine give way to gloom and rain...

For me:

 A vase full of fresh cheery blooms never fail to put a smile on my face.


For my little girl:

 A room full of bubbles. Come to think of it, watching her so full of joy also puts a smile on my face.

Recipe: Oven Roasted Chicken

I have decided to to post recipes on this space from now on. While it is not really related to parenting, cooking sure comes as part of the responsibilities of being a SAHM. I reckon it will be a useful future reference for myself and the daughters should they be interested in pottering around the kitchen in time to come. And of course, those of you who pop by here are welcome to try out the recipes too!

Just a note though, if you are looking for professional cooking techniques, this is probably not for you. At the end of the day, I am really just a kitchen enthusiast (an aspiring kitchen goddess, not actually one!) who usually use cheats such as store-bought mix and sauces in my recipes. You probably can relate me more to noobcook. Lastly, I welcome all feedback and suggestions as to how to improve on the recipes too! Hope to hear from you! :)

So, the inaugural recipe post here shall be on oven roasted chicken. This is my second try and I have made some modifications from the original recipe that I copied online as the first try did not turn out too well (too salty and overcooked!).

Last night's roasted chicken was a hit. The meat was tender and succulent, the skin was flavourful with a tint of lime. The Husband pronounced it better than Kenny Rogers and even the helper was seemingly impressed. I was chuffed. Hee!


Ingredients (With two sides, it serves 3):

• 1 whole chicken, 1.3kg (Cut off head and feet)
• 1/2 teaspoon of salt
• 2 tablespoons of lime juice (I used Australian Tahitian lime that are often seen in NTUC these days)
• 1/4 cup (or 4 tablespoons) of light soy sauce
• 1/4 cup of canola oil
• 1 tablespoon of sesame oil (optional - I added it on a whim cos I love the fragrant smell of it!)
• 1 tablespoon of ketchup
• 1 tablespoon of chilli sauce
• 2 teaspoons of chopped garlic
• 3/4 teaspoon of coarse black pepper (or pepper mill grind black pepper for even fresher pepper taste!)
• 1/2 teaspoon of dried rosemary leaves
• 1 tablespoon of yellow mustard sauce

Method:
After cleaning the chicken and pat dry, rub salt all over chicken surface and insides. FYI, since it isn't a stuffed chicken, I did away with the tying. Put it in a large dish, add all the marinate ingredients in. Be sure that the ingredients are well-mixed and the chicken is well-covered (including the insides) by the marinate.

Chicken standing in the fridge.

Let it stand in the fridge for 8-24 hours. For last night, due to time constraint, I only let it stand in the fridge for 3 hours. However, I made it a point to flip the chicken after 1.5 hours so that both sides get to be partially submerged in the marinate.

Pre-heat the oven at 170 degrees Celsius for 15 minutes. Here is a few points to note. Mine is a conventional oven that do not have a rotisserie. Of course, having a rotisserie will ensure the chicken be evenly cooked. In this case, I overcame it by flipping the chicken later on (will touch on it later). Also, while the recipe calls for 170 degrees Celsius, note that all conventional ovens do differ in actual temperature. So it is important to suss out your oven and be able to adjust accordingly. In my case, I pre-heated the oven at 170 degrees Celsius and had it adjusted downwards later on.

Basting using metal spoon before putting into oven.

Take the chicken out from the fridge. Baste the chicken once before putting it into the oven. For those who are unfamiliar with the term basting, it basically means to glaze the chicken with the marinate. In my case, I do not have a brush, so I use a metal spoon to pour marinate over the chicken, a few spoonful at a time. Basting is crucial in ensuring that your chicken turns out flavorful. For ease of basting throughout baking, I put an additional tray in the oven below the chicken to collect the marinate drips for later use. 

Into the oven it goes!

For a 1.2kg-1.3kg chicken, bake it for 75 to 90 minutes. Check the chicken after 10-15 minutes. A sign that the temperature is too high is the blackening of the tips of the chicken wings. If so, adjust temperature downwards (5-10 degrees Celsius at a time). Baste chicken at every 15 minutes interval, collect drips for reuse.

Blackening of the tips of the wings means temperature is too high

At 45th-50th minute, flip the chicken onto the other side. To gentle as you lift the chicken up to prevent tearing of the skin.

Flipped to the other side.

At 75th minute, start checking if the chicken is cooked. As I do not have a meat thermometer, I use the skewer test. Poke it into the thickest flesh part of the chicken. If it comes out clean, it is cooked. It is uncooked if the skewer comes out pinkish (tint of blood).

Skewer comes out clean!

Once cooked, switch off oven. The chicken is ready to be served! :)

Yummilicious chicken ready to be served!

For dinner last night, I served up the chicken with mashed potato and buttery corn kernels on the side. I tried making brown gravy from the drips but unfortunately, the gravy tasted funny due to the amount of lime juice in the recipe. But then again, The Husband felt that the chicken was flavorful and juicy enough on its own. "No need gravy!", he said. I kinda agree. Usually, I have to have chilli sauce to go with my chickens. But for last night, I could do without it.:)

My bad!

One of our inside jokes has been about the way I sleep. The Husband often teased me about my unladylike postures when I'm fast asleep which includes lying face up with one leg crossed over the other while my arms go all the way underneath my pillow.

The other night as I was giving Anya her last milk feed before bedtime, I arranged her legs such that it resembles my infamous sleeping position. It was out of sheer fun and I meant it as a one-time off but somehow, it caught her attention. My impressionable tod probably thought it was a game and was smiling away and giving me sideway glances as she drank her milk. I could tell that she was making effort to balance her leg in that position, and she kept readjusting herself back despite her leg giving way a few times.

These days, The Husband and I find her crossing leg whenever she lies down and for a couple of times, she even tried doing so when sitting upright. I know I'll probably regret it when she is still crossing her leg like an ah beng eighteen years down the road, but right now, those chubby legs look so cute! :P

Notes from an aspiring kitchen goddess

Domestic goddess I am not. Though I always dreamed of being one. Or to be precise, I aspired to be a kitchen goddess, at the very least. I mean, given that I am plagued with sinus where dust reduces me to a specific dwarf that has teary eyes and big red nose, I reckon I am unlikely to excel in cleaning the ceiling fan or clearing out the storeroom. (Just thinking about these chores already set me off into a sneezing fit.)

Before Anya came along, I was the aspiring kitchen goddess who was always burying my head in recipe books in the community library and pestering my mom for recipes of our favourite childhood dishes. Then, I will spend hours in the kitchen.  On some days that I pottered in the kitchen, I would cook up a storm. Other days, the kitchen simply resembled a ruin land that a storm just swept through.

Between baking and cooking, I have always been baffled by baking. During my lower secondary school days where all girls were to take compulsory home economics classes, I was subjected to humiliation when my rock buns turned out to be fruit cakes and cakes turn out to be breads. Throughout my teenage and adolescent years, the only things that I was capable of baking were pineapple tarts with my mom (where I was in charge of dressing the pineapple fillings) and chocolate chips cookies (which I had to pass them off as chocolate buns occasionally).

Therefore, during the BA (Before Anya) times that I was striving to be a domestic goddess, I had bought a conventional oven and cake mixer and even went on to sign on baking classes. Along the way, my BQ (baking quotient??) must have shot up as I could finally produce presentable cakes and muffins. It seemed that I could finally have a glimpse of what it takes to be a kitchen goddess. But alas! It was not meant to last. The moment I fell pregnant with Anya, I took a hiatus from the kitchen for the next two years.

I always thought that baking/cooking skills are akin to motor skills. Once you acquire the art of cycling, you will always be able to transport yourself from point A to point B on the two-wheelers , even if you have not ride one in the last ten years or if you have suffered from amnesia in between. It goes the same for baking, or so I thought.

I am wrong.

After going through two cycles of pregnancy amnesia - still in the midst of the second one actually, I have forgotten even the basics of the basics. Just three weeks ago, I called up my mom to ask her if cooking a cup of rice is meant to feed one or two adults. In response, she guffawed for a good whole minute before replying me that a cup is for two. As for baking, I was perusing the recipes from my baking classes, and it felt as if I was reading them for the first time. No doubt, the notes taken were my very own handwriting, but the steps all seem rather unfamiliar. Still, I am determined to bake something. There is something about mommyhood that reignited my desire to be a kitchen goddess once again. I am hooked to having that fuzzy feeling that bubbles inside me every time Anya enjoys a dish/item that was prepared in my kitchen.

After two weeks of intensive studying of my recipes and reading up on the basics of baking principles (e.g. the different types of flour etc), I decided that my baking comeback item shall be the easiest of all cakes - muffins. And I am rather pleased with the result - 41 well-risen pretty chocolate chips and blueberry muffins!

Having said that, while having those fluffy fat muffins was a boost to my confidence; I am still a long long way from becoming Anna Olson or Martha Stewart. Still, one can always dream right?